Another month of things to be Thankful for

5/31: I'm thankful for our Primary kids. They crack me up! They have such sweet spirits and I love the chance to be in primary with them. 5/30: Happy BIrthday Mom! I am very grateful and so thankful that I have such a wonderful mom. She's my best friend and a caring, loving and giving mom and grandma. I'm also thankful for all the chances I have to take Terina out and teach her new things....today it was swimming at the BYUH pool. 5/29: I'm thankful that I didn't pop the blowup obstacle course in the gym as I was carrying Terina on my back through the whole thing. I really thought I was going to die with her on my back climbing up that "ladder" to go down the slide. It was quite the sight and I'm glad no one was a witness to it. 5/28: I'm thankful for Rainbow school and the fact that they didn't leave Terina there by herself when everyone else was sent home and because someone was sleeping and not answering the phone... we never got the message. But I'm glad they were nice enough to wait until I got off of work and they didn't leave her there. 5/26: I'm thankful for the chance that we have to pay tithing. Kasala and my dad : have always stressed the importance of paying an honest tithing. I'm so glad that we do even when I think we won't make it, something always comes up and we are truely blessed because of tithing. 5/25: Rainy holidays where we are forced to stay inside and be together. 5/24: I'm thankful that I can go to bed angry and wake up to a sparkling clean house. That's Kasala's way of saying sorry and it's the best apology in the world. 5/23: I'm thankful that Terina and I can go out and do things together and I don't have to worry so much about her behavior. 5/22: I'm thankful for the beautiful weather we've been having and the chance that we have to spend it outside with our friends. 5/21: I'm so happy that Terina is growing up and learning how to be a good friend and share with others. 5/20: Thankful to have gone for a nice run/walk today with a friend and then spend the rest of the afternoon with my husband shopping! 5/19: I faced a fear today and came out alive. I'm so thankful for how innocent and loving little 1st graders can be. They opened my eyes up to a whole different world of education that I can be a part of. 5/18: Honestly... I'm thankful I didn't do student teaching in Makena's 6th grade class. I almost killed myself after subbing 1 day in there. 5/17: Church was great today. I had to escort Terina home for horrible behavior but it didn't take away the Spirit I was feeling. 5/16: 5/15: That Terina calls me her best friend. I hope she still feels that way in a couple years. 5/14: I'm so so happy and grateful and thankful that Kasala got the RA job. I have been stressing on how we were going to make it this coming year and with this new job I don't have to worry about making rent every month. 5/13: I'm thankful for my dad. I've been thinking about him and how much he means to me. He's the best father in the world and I love him with all my heart. 5/12: I'm thankful for subbing in a class that has a student teacher! I get paid to sit there and do nothing while she teaches!! 5/11: 5/10: I am thankful for my mom. She's my best friend and I love here more and more each day. She's a wonderful person who has taught me how to endure... even when giving up seems a whole lot easier. 5/9: I'm thankful that Mom was able to convince Kasala to put the AC back up. It's freaking hot outside! 5/8: The ability to use my body. I was thinking today, what would it be like if I couldn't walk, or use my arms or if I had to have someone do everything for me. My body isn't that great and maybe I should put down the cookie and treat my body better. It's the only one 1 get. 5/7: Having a free babysitter here i.e. MOM so that Kasala and I could go out on a real date... Movie, dinner and a nice drive. And then we came home and slept on the floor because we forgot to blow up our air mattress :) 5/6: I'm thankful for the chance that I had to sit down and have a nice dinner with mom and Terina. 3 generations of women sitting down and having a good time. I love it! 5/5: May Day and working while kids are getting ready for it. $160.00 to watch the Magic School Bus and Hotel For Dogs with some 3rd graders... sign me up! 5/4: Blow up air mattresses are great. Way better than sleeping on the hard floor. We've just been to late to blow up the mattress... But not tonight! 5/3: Terina (it's her birthday) and the blessing that she's brought to our family. It's because of her that we are the little family that we are and we love her so much. 5/2: MOM IS HERE! I'm thankful that she had time to come and spend a week with us for Terina's birthday. It makes it more meaningful when family is around to share in the good times. 5/1: The ability to hold my tongue and temper because I really wanted to just give it to a class that I was substituting for today. I was seriously ready to come unglued and I was pretty darn proud of myself for not. A little ISS should do them good :)

The Next Survivor Series!

Nope... this has nothing to do with Survivor Samoa it's just something I saw and laughed at. I don't think I'd be able to survive all this and I KNOW Kasala wouldn't be able to for sure! Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for six weeks. Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes . There is no fast food. Each man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, and complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of 'pretend' bills with not enough money. In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week. Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives, and send cards out on time--no emailing. Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment. He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the Urgent Care. He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function. Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside and keeping it presentable at all times. The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done. The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, adorn himself with jewelry, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep fingernails polished and eyebrows groomed. During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other duties. They must attend weekly school meetings, church, and find time at least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting. They will need to read a book to the kids each night and in the morning, feed them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair by 7:00 am. A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes size and doctor's name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth, and length of labor, each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear and what they want to be when they grow up. The kids vote them off the island based on performance. The last man wins only if... he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice. If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over and over again for the next 18-25 years eventually earning the right To be called Mother!

Our Refined Heavenly Home

My Grandma Millar got us a subscription to the Ensign and Friend for Christmas. I think she knew that I wouldn't do it myself and that, although it doesn't cost much, I wouldn't budget it in. Anyways, they came in the mail yesterday and usually I just give Terina the Friend and the Ensign sits on the piano and I'll occasionally flip through it. Yesterday was a different story. The cover has a picture of a family on it and a subtitle of Creating Heavenly Homes. Just what I need right?! So I opened it this morning and sat down to read. I know my home is far from being Heavenly but this far?! I now see that we, as a family, have much more work to do. One thing that really stood out to me was a part towards the end that talks about keeping up our appearances. Out here in Laie it's a common thing to see girls walking around with their hair in a bun, basketball shorts, over sized t-shirts and flip flops. It's freaking hot all the time and now its muggy. Anyways, it says "We must not let ourselves go and become so casual-even sloppy-in our appearance that we distance ourselves from the beauty heaven has given us." I never thought about that. We were created in the image of our Heavenly parents and I'm pretty sure that my Heavenly mother does not look this tore up all the time. The article gives so much information that is really common sense but maybe things we don't think about. It talks about language too. You and I both know that cursing and swearing are not right but something that I never, NEVER thought of was how they speak in Heaven. "We would be disappointed if God had used "awesome" or other exaggerated phrases." Really? I never thought about those kinds of words or phrases as being ungodly but the article goes on to talk about using proper speech and refinement in talking. Just those 2 things alone gives me a lifetime of things to work on. Anyways, it's a great article and I can't wait to read the rest of the Ensign. Right after I clean my house and fix my face

81 degrees and Raining

Today I didn't work (what a shocker) and I had laundry and working out on my list of things to do. Laundry for the most part was the only thing I got accomplished. I was dressed and ready to hit the street when I opened the door and it was pouring rain. I could have made it to the car and then to the gym but for some reason I just shut the door and went back to the couch. So much for my work out routine. But the XBox came to the rescue. We get netflix on the Xbox so I jumped online and sent about 10 workout videos to the XBox and away I went. Who knew I would sweat so much even though I was standing right in front of the freaking air conditioner. And who knew that I couldn't hold my body up on 1 hand and 1 leg... well, I knew that and I'm sure you all knew that too... but at least I tried!! It's beautiful outside right now and I have an ice cold V8 to look forward to for dinner while Kasala and Terina dine on pork chops, rice and corn. I'm determined though to lose a tad bit of weight in the next 7 weeks... and then a little more before Jake gets married. I know I can do it but in 9 weeks... we'll see.

Just Another Day

Terina is really into make up right now and because I don't wear or have any, her wonderful "aunties" out here buy it for her. She got some real cute lip gloss for her birthday and of course I opened it for her. Kasala told me to keep an eye on her, which I didn't, and this was the result. I personally think she looks good but then again what do I know about makeup. I always had to have someone else do it for me. Needless to say it was a mess to clean up before going out in public.

. Terina also got a huge thing of chalk for her birthday and it's been a hit outside at the playground. She's actually been sharing with her friends too so that's even better! They usually just draw and try to get their moms to draw different animals for them, which most of the time we do but sometimes we just tell them to do it and we keep talking. Well my neighbor Adam came out with his daughter Ady and he got conned into drawing for the girls. First an alligator, then giraffe and zebra, flamingo and then list goes on and on.

Then he took the girls and traced their bodies for them to color in. They had so much fun and now, everyday, they want us to trace their bodies. They even got someone at Rainbow School to trace them on the blacktop! They love their chalk and I love it when Terina shares her toys without any problems. She has so much fun with all the other kids here. She either needs a sibling or we just need to make sure we live somewhere with a ton of other kids when Kasala finishes school.

Rena Bena

Jeff is a police officer. His wife Bree is a social worker. Mike is a family therapist or counselor or something like that I don't know. Kasala is going to school majoring in social work. Now it was brought to my attention that I may be a little to hard on Terina. When things are good I don't really write about them. When I get frustrated and I can't stand it anymore I blog about how frustrated I am. I think Terina may be getting the short end of the stick on that deal. So... I thought I would write something about her. Something nice for a change. Terina was an expected blessing. She's the glue that held our little family together for the first year. We have grown so much because of her and because of her sweet spirit. She is so full of energy and I have to wonder what they feed her at Rainbow School. Sometimes I think its all sugar but then I come to realize that's just how she is. She is always going! She's like the little pink bunny on TV. Recently she has started to have little imaginary friends or her Barbie's will start talking to her. She's always acting out things that happen at school that day or things that we have done in the past. And she sings.... she is ALWAYS singing. She sings primary songs, nursery rhythms, songs from school and her new favorite song, Beyonce's Put a Ring on It. She walks around singing that song all the time. In general she's a happy child and her singing, although sometimes loud, out of tune and repetitive, brings happiness into our home. We just got back from a walk and I listened to Terina talk about her friends and people that we see and spend a lot of time with. We stopped in the office when we got back, due to being locked out, and my friend Roo was working. When we left Terina said good bye, good night and Happy Mothers Day. While walking back to our apartment she told me that she loved Aunty Roo because she always had good treats and chippies. I love my daughter very much. She is one of the best and greatest things that has happened to me. She has taught me so many things and continues to help me improve my life. I know I am a daughter of Heavenly Father and Terina is teaching me that I need to work on being a better mother and teaching her that she is a daughter of our Heavenly Father. She is why I'm here on earth.... my children are my mission, and teaching them that we are an Eternal family is the goal. Now I just need to make our home a heaven on earth. How I'm gonna do that... patients I guess.

Dying Ugly

I made my little avatar, I ate all the pop tarts and oreos I could and I ate my last double cheese burger. And yes... I actually went out on Monday and ran. IT WAS UGLY! I went to the gym when Kasala got home from work. The gym use to close at 11pm... or at least in my world it did. So I roll in about 9:37 and they started turning off the lights at 9:50pm. No one said anything to me (I had my ear phones on anyways so I wouldn't have listened) and I just kept running. I was almost finished and then ALL the lights went off and I noticed I was the only one in there. So I got off, tried to catch my breath, and went home. It was a horrible sight to see me in the gym running. I use to run. I use to run a lot when I was here before. Granted I ran a lot when I got dumped, I wasn't eating much either, I didn't have a child and I was trying to look good for the guy who I still loved who dumped me! So... this person who I use to be is still in my head. I jumped on thinking this is going to be a piece of cake...what it ended up being was the treadmill BEGGING me to get the hell off of it! I honestly thought I was going to break the thing. I couldn't believe it. So I went home even more depressed than when I got on the stupid thing. I've decided that maybe running isn't for me right now. I think I'm a walker. I'll be a walker until I don't look like I'm dying when I run, when the treadmill doesn't sound like it's going to collapse under me and when my knees aren't crying out "What are you thinking fatty!?" But I'm not giving up. I'm actually proud of my little avatar and I look at that thing on here so much now that she isn't playing video games and playing with that stupid ball hooked to the paddle.

Potty Talk

***Please be advised.... No actual beatings took place on this day. Terina's door was never locked and she could get out if she wanted to. Kind of sucks having a brother for a police officer, a sister in law for a social worker and a husband majoring in social work. I DON'T BEAT OR LOCK MY CHILD IN ROOMS*** I can't take this anymore! Terina has been using the toilet for the last couple months. No she still isn't going poop and that's one of the frustrating parts. When mom was here I really thought that she would do it but no.... she didn't care that Grandma brought her a potty treat for going poop in the toilet. She ASKS for a pull up now when she has to poop and I refuse to give her one! I make her sit on the toilet. And she'll sit there all day and not poop. But now it's not only pooping in the toilet but she's pissing her pants like crazy! She has peed her pants 3 times today! 3 FREAKIN TIMES and now she's locked in the bedroom because I just want to beat her with a shoe or a spoon or whatever I can get my hands on. It's not like she doesn't know where the toilet is... IT HASN'T MOVED SINCE WE LIVED HERE! It's still in the same place... first door on the left. HECK! It's the ONLY DOOR ON THE LEFT! The child is killing me! Terrible 2's?! She hell at 3! She talks back, she started doing this thing where she "spits" in your face.... I swear, I don't know where she is getting it from but I'll beat it out of her. I feel like I'm not teaching her right from wrong, good from bad. When mom was here everything thing was great. We were happy and she listened and I didn't yell. Now... I can hear her in the bedroom crying her eyes out. "Mommy! Mommy! I sorry!! Please mommy! Open the door!" Sad, I know. And the whole while this is going on I sit here blogging about how frustrated I am. "Let her cry it out" I keep telling myself and she'll be just fine. I know I have to keep her in there until I can go in and calmly put her to bed cause if I go in now... World War III will break out.

I've Been Sucked In

So I've been sucked in to something that should be good for me. Over Spring Break I went running quite often with Makena. Of course I slowed her down and it did nothing for her to take me along but now she's training for a marathon! NO!! I'm not running a marathon. I can't even run outside! I hate it. I can run on a machine all day but out on the road it's another story. So if I can work my way up to a half marathon on the treadmill I'll be happy. School is out on June 5th and I'll be out of a job until July 27th. Jake is getting married on July 25th and Kasala got a new job. So he and I decided that Terina will still go to Rainbow School, even though we're both at home, and we'll go to the gym together. The goal, lose weight before Jake gets married. I'm not sure if we are going to get to go but its one of those "just in case" type things. I'm always the fat one in the weddings and I'll still be the fat one but I wanna be the fat, comfortable one not the fat, depressed, my dress doesn't fit me one. So I just set up my workout schedule on nikeplus.com and I'll have to log my miles everyday because I'll have my little running buddy on here!! And we'll see what Kasala and I can get done in 9 weeks. I better go eat all those pop tarts before Monday morning! And when I come home, if we come home this summer, I wanna go to hot yoga with you Paaga!!

To: Ariel and Lili

Lili and Ariel.. I'd like to introduce you to Emma, Anthony's daughter, Terina and... their MOON BOOTS. After seeing your post of what not to wear i just thought I'd share what our girls like to wear. Very stylish huh? Not as cute as your cute little slippers but you know.

Terina's 3 years old!

So I felt like a bad mom cause I didn't get her birthday blog up sooner... and Lili got Ariels' up that day... so I'm a little slow but I gotta keep up right?

Anyways, Terina had her birthday party on Saturday and she's still talking about it today. Sunday we went out for Terina's birthday. We went to the Swap Meet and did a little walking around. Mom got some things she needed and I got some sun. Terina did really well there. She walked around holding our hands and she rode in the stroller. She didn't take off like she use to and Kasala didn't go crazy on her like HE use to. Then we went to Wal Mart and Grandpa bought her a "Big Girl" bike with training wheels, little pom poms on the handle bars, a basket and a water bottle. She loves it and she rides around singing "I got a new bike. I got a new bike" which I had to teach her wasn't a nice thing to say.

We went to Farrell's for lunch. They were pounding on a drum, had a siren going off the they sang happy birthday to Terina. She was really shy but then she started to warm up. She had a lot of fun there. She kept herself pretty much occupied by making faces into the napkin holder. She's pretty vain.. always looking at herself and saying how cute she is.... makes me sick :)

This past week has been full of adventures. I had to work 2 days so mom and Terina stayed home during the day. They went on a picnic to the Temple and rode bikes and stuff. Wednesday we went back to the swap meet to get a few more things for mom to take home and then we went to the zoo. Terina loved it! We had lunch and then went to the petting zoo. She played with the goats and looked at the pigs and llamas. We then went off to look for the giraffes and zebras. First we came to the monkeys. It was actually pretty scary. They had caught a peacock that flew over into their little area and totally ripped it to pieces. One of the monkeys was really pissed off... probably cause he didn't get anything to eat and while Terina had her face against the glass he came tip toeing up and then tried to drop kick her! She got so scared! I tried to get a picture of it but I was to slow. Plus... the camera died. It was mom's camera and anyone who knows my mom knows that she has a tendency to NOT CHARGE THINGS. Anyways, I think I'm just going to make a slide show of mom's visit here. Don't wanna post to many pictures on one blog! :)

Slip and Slide

Terina turns 3 tomorrow! It's been a wild ride these past 3 years too. Anyways... Terina has a little group that she rolls with and they are all the same age. Tanaya, Aneia and Terina are the Three Stoogies. Aneia turned 3 last Sunday and Terina's birthday is tomorrow. Mom and I were planning on throwing her a Tinker Bell party and were working on getting things ready the last couple weeks. Aneia and Terina were going to have parties on the same day so her mom and I decided just to do it together. And it was a beautiful day today too. What started out as a little party for 5 turned into something bigger. From inside the house to outside behind W building. From little games to slip and slides and pools. It turned out really well. Kasala and Oz did the BBQ and the kids played. I don't have very many pictures but I'll get some more from Makena who took a bunch.